It is not enough to take steps which may some day lead to a goal; each step must be itself a goal and a step likewise. -Johann Wolfgang von Goethe I didn't really want to bring personal problems into the mix, but they're really affecting my mood right now and of course it affects my eating habits. I've hardly slept the past two nights. My bf and I...well we seem to be over. We're taking a break. Do people ever come back from those and actually stay together? It's crushing, but I think we've both taken each other for granted one too many times.
Really, what makes it all worse now, is the urge to bury myself. Especially where food is concerned. I was proud of myself, however. Took one bite of ice cream instead of eating half a pint. Didn't go grab fast-food or other junk. I just hope it doesn't get much worse, because I don't know what else to channel my feelings of loss into. I wasn't expecting the first possible road bump to come so soon. We'll see how the next few days go.
My drive to move forward is still at a running pace, thankfully. I wrote up some mini goals and rewards this morning.
Mini goal 1: 260lbs
Reward: Manicure & Pedicure
Mini goal 2: 230lbs
Reward: New hair style
Mini goal 3: 200lbs
Reward: Piercing
Mini goal 4: 175lbs
Reward: Tattoo
Mini goal 5: 150lbs
Reward: Trip to NYC (Can anyone say Broadway?)
I also figured for every 10lbs I'd buy myself some tv dvds. I've been trying not to buy them, so it should be an incentive for me to lose weight to get the ones I've been waiting to grab. I'm missing some Lost, Grey's, Castle, Psych, M*A*S*H (Alan Alda <3). I'm crossing my fingers that the incentives are good enough to be long-lasting.
How to Build a Home Athletic Facility
10 years ago
5 comments:
I'm really sorry to hear about you and your bf, and I hope that you both find a solution than is for the best. *hugs* You'll get through it *more hugs*
Thanks Mango *hugs*
Good luck to you Meg! Yay TV DVD's as a reward! Boo Alan Alda! ;)
Hey buddy! Shush, you know you love The Alda! If only for Scientific American!
I'm sorry you are going through so much pain. Of course it affects other aspects of your life! Food, food choices, desire or not to exercise; it's all intertwined. You have to accept that it is. But, because of that, you have to work towards not giving your bf that control of your emotions any more. It will take time, of course. But you have to stop letting someone else be the major catalyst on whether your mood and outlook is good and positive, or not. What you need to first do is spend some time pampering yourself. But choose NON-FOOD methods. You know, a nice warm bubble bath if you like them, with candles, wrapping up in an afghan and enjoy a book you are reading only for pleasure, listening to your favorite music....watching a funny movie....anything that doesn't take a lot of time, money, or work counter-productive to your health goals. Slowly take the time to find ways to please yourself, and you will start to heal. If you and he are meant to be together, you will. Personally, though, I don't think a relationship that needs 'time apart'....is destined to work out long term. But that's just a generalization I've found to be true....can't say it's in all cases.
Oh, and your link for me on your blogroll is bad; here's my new url:
http://thesunnylife.com/
Take care!
Post a Comment